No, I won't argue with you

Arguing is not fun.

It is not a hobby

It is not something I like to do

It is not something I try to do.

I am a coward when it comes to fighting.

I try to walk away,

Avoid,

Ignore,

Tune out,

Be teflon coated,

Let it go.

But I can only handle my button being pushed

so many times.

Even patience has a limit.

So cute

Inspired by a video of Keith Urban and Chris Janson. Written on 10/10/17, but it didn't post.

So cute.

A couple of grown men

Playing electric guitars

and singing a bluegrass song.

Sweet harmony.

Sweet music..

Need some sweet

in our lives.

These days.

Every day.

Lost and Found

Inspired by a story in the news today.

Multiple families

With multiple children

Living in one house.

Does that explain

how a mother

could leave her three-year old

behind,

Go home,

Watch a movie,

Fall asleep,

And not notice until the next morning

that her son

wasn’t in his bed

or in the house.

Is that bad parenting?
Is that a red flag that something is wrong?

With the mom?

With the other adults in the house?

With the living arrangements?

The question gets raised,

Is this person fit to be a parent?

Many of us have grown children

and still aren’t sure we did it right.

We were sometimes late,

Sometimes short tempered,

Sometimes wrong,

Sometimes not as present as we should have been.

But at the end of the day,

the last thing we did

was tuck in a child,

Say good night,

And

Stand at the bedroom door

And marvel

at the beauty

and tranquility,

Mesmerized

by the sight

Of a son or daughter,

And marveling that

this child

was the most incredible thing

we ever created.

Physically leaving a child behind

Is sad.

Ignoring and not nurturing a child

Is sad.

Not remembering to say good night

to a three year old child

Is sad.

How

Do

Things

Like

This

Happen

Without

Someone

Noticing

Warning

Signs?

Lost in a maze,

Found by a stranger.

All it takes is

one wrong turn,

To change a life

forever.

Bunt Paper

This probably needs more work. But it was ready to come out now. So many fires burning.

Burnt paper

Floats up from the ground

Stirred by a warm wind

Could be

Someone’s memories

Or a bill

Or maybe a newspaper

Or car registration

Reduced to ash

By a hungry fire

Feeding on mountain kindling,

Air,

And anything in it’s everchanging path.

Roaring

Cracking

Blackening

Killing.

Orange wall of heat

And flame

Consuming

And spitting out ash

That rains down

Miles away

In a smoky sky

How can the sunset look so beautiful

When so much is being destroyed?

Ash

Rising into the air

spinning

Floating

Settling

On foreign ground

Whether new roots will grow

Remains to be seen.

Ready

Ready to feel better.

Mentally ready

Physically ready

to take on the world,

or at least my small part of it.

Ready to run,

Ready to ride,

Ready to walk

with confidence

wherever I want to go.

Ready for romance,

Ready for love,

Ready for friendships

that last

even when I decide to move on.

Prepared for whatever comes my way,

Prepared to take on whoever I need to

Prepared to do what I need to do

to make my life

what I want it to be.

Feeling better already.

Struggling

Struggling to reconcile

Liberty and justice for all

and

Equality

in a country

Where discrimination is

not illegal.

Where decisions are made

based on

religious principles,

In a country

founded

by men 

who believed in a

Separation of church and state.

Struggling to understand my place

in a country

where

my religion is a minority

And my belief system,

my ethics

my values

are demeaned

Based upon religious teachings

of wealthy powerful leaders,

Rather than the true words of our prophets

and the spirituality of God.

Whose dreams get to come true

I'm not sure where i planned to go when I started this one. I think my thoughts are still being led by current events and a growing sense of futility, or maybe apathy, or numbness.  And a small sense of hopefulness, that this too shall pass and we will emerge stronger.

Dreams and fantasies,

We all have them.

Some of us get to live them.

Some of us don’t.

Is it courage

or luck

or a little of both?

Do we all have wings?

(figurative, not literal)?

Do we all get a chance

to soar?

How many of us crash

and choose to not fly again?

Because, yes,

we all crash and burn,

at some point.

Many lives

end too early.

Physically alive,

and no hope of growing.

Many lives never get the chance

to take off.

Many lives,

Full of

Dreams,

Nightmares,

Lifetimes,

Lifelines.

Different routes,

Straight paths,

Tangled webs.

No matter where people go in their lives,

they all end up in the same place

At some point.

Everything is up in the air

except the inevitable end.

How much can we take

Weather, weapons, out of our control, caused by man. Tragedy upon tragedy. Numb and crying. 

How much can a heart take?

Personal

Love

Humanity

We hurt when we see people hurt

Religion

To heal

To justify

To ground.

So much scar tissue.

So much pain.

So many tears.

And then

We get hit again

More hurt

More soul searching

More heartache.

How much more can we take?
How much more can we give?

How much

is

too

much?

And why are we trying so hard to find out?

Forgive me?

Yom Kippur reprise?

I’m not sure I like the phrase

forgive me.

It sound like groveling,

knees on the ground

arms up,

begging.

It sounds theatrical and dramatic,

two things I am not.

Yom Kippur is the Day of Atonement

a time for reflecting

on how I may have wronged others

and seeking forgiveness

from God,

or from those I have wronged.

It’s a difficult thing,

to go back over the past twelve months

and try to remember

mistakes I made

insults I said

things I did that might have hurt someone.

Twelve months is a long time.

Especially this time around.

This time last year I was living in Colorado,

paradise.

My work life was getting stressful

and I was getting itchy feet.

I was in limbo,

working my ass off

while wondering if the interview I had just done

would turn out to be anything.

And, if it did,

would I have the guts to go.

So reflecting on wrongs I inflicted on others

is not exactly the highlight of

the past year.

And I will not apologize to anyone for

putting myself first

and doing what I needed to do.

Quit while you're ahead

Quit while you’re ahead.

Common sense.

Say what?

Stop

   talking

      about

         quitting.

It sounds so

   negative.

It sounds like

   giving up

It sound like

   being scared of losing.

No more quitting.

No more negative.

Be positive.

Be in control of your destiny

Decide when you are ready to move on,

Decide when you think

   you have done enough.

Stop,

   on your terms.

Move on

   when you are ready.

Don’t stay

   because someone needs you to,

      Unless YOU need to.

Don’t be a quitter.

Be a doer

   who cares about others

      and cares about challenging

himself/herself.

And if that means stepping aside,

   changing course,

   moving on and leaving something unfinished,

      Do it.

It becomes finished as soon as you leave it behind.